What would your life be like if you did only what was easy?
Let me repeat the question:
What would your life be like if you only did what was easy?
It’s almost unsettling to go there, isn’t it? When I try to answer that question for myself I squirm a bit. Lazy dilettante. As IF. What would I do with all that extra time I’d have if I just did the easy stuff? Hmmm . . . maybe I’d have more time to enjoy what I’ve got and get more of what I want. Maybe things would be . . . easier.
Ease. The concept confounds most of us. Here’s why:
Pay your dues. Put in your time. Prove yourself. Check the right box. Stay the course. Meet expectations. Soldier on. Nothing worthwhile comes easy. Good things come to those who wait. Blue collar, white collar, hard work pays off. No pain, no gain. Thomas Edison put it this way: There is no substitute for hard work.
We’ll call these, collectively, the Myth of Endurance: a concept that you can choose to believe in, in varying degrees, or not. “Easy” is also a concept that can be just as useful to you. The easy way is a direction that leads to spacious places.
Choosing easy is smart, efficient, elegant; a fantastic form of self-compassion; giving yourself a break and getting out of your own way. Choosing easy is letting inspiration be your compass. Choosing easy is allowing for the things that you’ve been asking for to enter your life. Now, let’s be clear, there are two types of easy. Quality easy and cheap easy. We’re aiming for Quality, with a capital Q.
THE QUALITY KIND OF EASY
Quality easy has a sense of fluidity to it. There’s a gravitational pull forward. Quality easy relies on his inner strength. Quality easy has an abiding respect for herself. Quality easy has fewer things on the to-do list and is a brilliant delegator. Quality easy trusts the timing of things. He knows it’s better to hold out for what’s right than to deal with the mess of extracting himself from a bad compromise. The minute resentment and irritation set in to a task, Quality easy goes on red alert. She steers clear of aggravation, annoyance, and repetitive misery. Over time,
Quality easy gets comfortable saying no, thank you, to things that are just too complicated and too distant from what she really wants. She is willing to let it go, get over it, and walk away— because she
has better things to do with her life energy. It’s that simple, most of the time. Quality easy brings a sense of expansion to things. Quality easy is
compelling—because when you say yes to grace, you’re saying yes to the natural flow of life. You lift your face toward the divine, like flowers lean into the light.
THE CHEAP KIND OF EASY
Cheap is a sucker for a discount. Cheap easy can’t see that some losses are gains. Cheap easy stays in a stifling relationship because it seems easier than facing the heartbreak and dividing up the furniture. Cheap easy is frequently in a rush, a smidge desperate, and usually scrambling for options. Cheap easy tells little white lies to get things done. The path of least resistance isn’t about shortcuts, cutting corners, or being clever. And it’s certainly not about making mediocrity acceptable. It’s about optimizing the truth. It’s about casting your seeds on the most fertile soil for your best chances for success.
START WITH THE EASY STUFF
Easy is sublimely logical. Consider all of the things you want to create, produce, accomplish, put out in the world, and experience—so many roads that could lead to satisfaction. Start with the project or the aspect of the project that is the easiest. What do you already know the most about? Where are there already ambassadorship and alliances? What are people already asking you for?
The same goes for creating satisfying relationships. What’s already going well that you can lean in to? What do you adore about the other person that you can focus on? The easy stuff is right in front of you and totally doable: simple kindnesses freely given day to day. Start there and you can approach the big hairy issues with some lightness.
Instant gratification has gotten a bad rap. I’m all for it. Why would you want to delay gratification? Within the constraints of morality and maturity, you should do whatever you need to do to feel gratified in the moment. It may be as subtle as choosing a more positive thought or reminding yourself to smile. Maybe it’s taking two minutes in your car or at your desk to do nothing but just feel into the day. Maybe instant gratification is fifty sit-ups for an adrenaline rush, ordering dessert first, giving an unexpected hug, signing the lease, or telling your boss to shove it. You can be responsible to those around you while creating immediate pleasure for yourself.
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